IF you are a parent and want some advice on ways to raise your children, you’ve come to the right place.
Child therapist Jeanette Razo-González, known on TikTok as ‘littlestepsgiantleaps’ regularly shares her parent-child relationship tips to social media.
Recently, she took to the video sharing platform to share her tips and tricks on what not to do with children.
She explained that as a result of her job as a play therapist, there are five things she would never do with her children.
The mum uploaded her video with the caption ‘These are 5 things I, personally, don’t do. Some of these may be controversial and everyone can parent however they choose.
‘These are simply my choices for my home. What are things you do or don’t do with your kids?’
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The mum explained: “Here are five things I don’t do with my own children because of my work as a play therapist.”
Unlimited screen time
While many parents may give their child an iPad when they start acting up, Jeanette is very against this.
She said: “We don’t allow unlimited screen time so that means that we don’t have the TV on as background noise or use screen time as a reward for our kids.
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“The reason for this is that I don’t want them to get used to it, I don’t want it to become high value for them.
“The two most important reasons that I do this are that number one, I don’t want my kids choosing screen time over play time with each other, or independent play and number two, I don’t want screen time to be a barrier to our connection or organic communication throughout the day.”
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No complaints about partner
Secondly, while you may be tempted to make a complaint about your partner to your child, this is something that Jeanette avoids.
She continued: “Number two, I don’t complain about my husband to my children.
“I don’t do this because it is an unhealthy parent-child dynamic, it creates a lot of stress for the child to carry and reduces the sense of safety or security that they feel in their relationship with us.”
As well as this, this child therapist doesn’t believe in time-outs and thinks they actually make things worse.
Jeanette added: “Number three is that I don’t do time-outs.
“I don’t do this because I don’t want my child dealing with big feelings by themselves and I don’t want them to think that their feelings make me uncomfortable.
“I want them to grow up in a home where they can talk about their feelings and know that I will hold space for those feelings.”
Don’t ignore tantrums
Not only that, but Jeanette explains the importance of not ignoring tantrums.
She advised: “Number four is that I will not ignore a tantrum.
“The reason for this is I believe that because is communication and when they are having a tantrum, they are having big emotions that they cannot communicate with words, so I want to be there, I want to be present and I want them to know that I’m not going to leave when they’re feeling at their worst”.
Don’t spank children
Finally, while spanking a child is something that divides many parents, Jeanette claims that she would never do that to her child.
She concluded: “Number five, I will not spank my child.
“The reason for this is that I don’t believe that it will teach them anything, I don’t want them to think that I will ever hurt them, I don’t want them to be afraid of me and I don’t want them to think that violence towards them is ever ok”.
Clearly Jeanette’s video has impressed many, as it has racked up a whopping 381.7k views.
It has 20.3k likes, 474 comments and 898 shares.
Many TikTok users agreed with Jeanette’s tips and took to the comments to express this.
One user commented: “Such great advice, number 2 is absolutely true!”
Someone else said: “I love this”.
A third added: “I wish I had advice like this when I became a parent. I figured all this out over time, this is Phenomenal advice and it all makes sense now.”
Another claimed: “That was so amazing”.
In particular, lots of parents agreed with the tip that you should not give your children unlimited screen time.
One person said: “Love number 1. I’m a speech therapist and I’m so sad that babies have phones at the grocery store. So many missed language opportunities”.
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Another added: “We cut out screen time for 1 week now and I’ve seen HUGE improvement in my kids behaviour in just 2 days.”
A third commented: “The no screen time – last year we took away the TV. Basically we only let them watch one show/ movie one day a week and they are doing incredible!!”
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